5-year Old Check-up

4 Mar

Tomorrow Ryu has his 5-year old check up. He was meant to go in January but he had the flu. I was just going to flag it completely as neither Marina or Shou did this check – due to it only being introduced last year.

The city holds 3 checks and strongly recommends all 5 year olds – who will be starting school in April 2016, attend. And by strongly recommend I mean ring you repeatedly and then ring your husband kind of strongly recommend. Tomorrow’s check isn’t in our town and hub will be taking Ryu to the welfare center in the next town over.

From what I can gather it isn’t your normal kind of check. They do weigh the kids and check their height, and possibly the circumference of their head, but mainly it is to check social skills and how they interact with others. It is so that professionals can gauge whether or not a child might have some learning disabilities that need to be looked at before they start school, like ADHD or Autism, which may or may not be directly related to number of vaccinations had and/or how many super foods the child has in his breakfast, which may or may not include chia seeds and coconut oil.

Of course there is a part of me a bit worried that they will detect some kind of issue with Ryu – but I think a greater part of me is hoping hub remembers to ring me when they tell him our son is boarding on either giftedness, genius, cuteness, combination of all three… I’m not fussy.

The reason I can’t go is because we have kinder PTA all morning – which will include practicing how to cross a pretend zebra crossing, singing a traffic light song and then spending half an hour while nobody makes eye contact with the teacher – because that means you will instantly become PTA head for the following year. This followed by school PTA bollocks ALL afternoon. I would love for hub to go to the PTA instead but I am head of one of the divisions and have to get up in front of everyone and read something aloud. This will take me all of approximately 17 and half seconds but still, it must take preference over finding out if my youngest child is a genius or not.

Hub must take Ryu’s plunker book and questionnaire – that I filled out last night. In addition to asking the ages of all other people living under the same roof, it has questions like:

  • What kind of play does your child like?
  • Do they push friends over and yell a lot?
  • Do they mind being hugged?
  • Can they brush their own teeth?
  • Are they left or right handed?
  • Are they forgetful?
  • Are they particularly meticulous about anything?
  • Do you enjoy raising your children?

And then there is a section on can your child skip, swing by themselves, go poo by themselves, hop, do up their buttons, and last but not least, does your child understand how paper,scissors, rock works? People residing in Japan will know that not understanding paper, scissors, rock would almost set you back a few years socially because it is used, by everyone, to decide, anything.

  • Whose turn is it? 1,2,3 paper, scissors rock
  • Who is on washing up? 1,2,3 paper, scissors rock
  • Who shall I vote for? 1,2,3 ….
  • Who gets the promotion? 1,2,3….

Actually, probably not used to decide on who gets a promotion, as promotions based solely on how long person has been working at said job, and not given on merit or worth.

Anyhoo, I will be very interested to hear from hub how Ryu’s check goes tomorrow. Today the boy is at a kinder picnic – for which he requested the anime character スイカニャン、which in ALL seriousnessness is an orange cat with two tails masquerading as a watermelon.


Fuck, I know, right!!

Don’t you just love Japan.






8 Responses to “5-year Old Check-up”

  1. Ruth March 5, 2015 at 10:07 am #

    So is he confirmed as a genius? Have you shipped him off to Todai or Keiyo?

    • gaijinwife March 5, 2015 at 2:06 pm #

      no, the lad is not a genius, unfortunately, but I still have hopes I will be able to somersault him off to Johny’s…..

  2. Kathryn March 5, 2015 at 4:05 pm #

    You know the test is solely to test their rock, scissors, paper skills and everything else is just to trick you into not thinking that 🙂

    • gaijinwife March 6, 2015 at 12:37 am #

      I bet you’re right 🙂 Hub said he passed with flying colors.

  3. Susan March 5, 2015 at 6:57 pm #

    I had no idea rock, scissors & paper were an integral part of Japanese decision making. Boy, would I fail. I can never keep straight which beats which. And also, I can’t believe Ryu is 5 already.

    • gaijinwife March 6, 2015 at 12:39 am #

      In Marina’s winter homework there was a couple of pages on paper, scissor, rock variations from around the world. We had to try then and then she had to write her thoughts. There was one from a country with obviously a lot of wildlife, I can’t remember which, and the frog beat the caterpillar which in turn could beat the gorilla, or something like that. It was all very confusing and the hand signals were near impossible.

  4. Ruth March 6, 2015 at 10:33 am #

    I don’t know if you’ve ever seen “The Big Bang Theory” but how about “Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard, Spock!”

    • gaijinwife March 7, 2015 at 6:45 am #

      haha – some of them were about this crazy!

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