15cm of pain

17 Apr

This has nothing to do with the last post. Ryu has not been stabbed with scissors and in fact had an injury free day yesterday. I went to pick him up and mother of boy 2 was there to pick up her son, who was having a complete meltdown because the teacher had made him get off the trike because it was home time. The mum was holding her baby and the teacher had to physically restrain the boy by holding him – all the way out to the car. My sources tell me this is the first time the boy has ever been in a group setting with other kids. He has been at home for five years hailing I imagine as king of the entire house until his brother came along a year ago and he got bumped down the food chain. And now, of all things, he has to follow some rules.

Yaddah yaddah, I know. I haven’t walked a mile in this mother’s shoes and am going solely on the approximate one hour of this boys life I have seen over the last 3 days.

Anyhoo, meltdowns aside, this post is about a fucking RULER. It will neither enlighten you or forecast your aura for the next day so stop reading if you don’t want to lose 3 minutes of your day reading about a god damn fucking ruler.

On Wednesday Shou and Marina came home and I immediately checked their homework and whether there were any letters or random bits of useless information from the school. I’m not normally this organized and this usually gets left until about 90 seconds before we have to leave the house the next morning.

In Shou’s parent-teacher book there is an ENTIRE paragraph devoted to a 15cm ruler.

“Marina doesn’t have a 15cm ruler. Shou has two. When I asked him to lend one to Marina he did but it turns out the ruler he lent to Marina was another boy’s and neither Shou or this boy can remember borrowing or lending the ruler. He wouldn’t lend Marina his ruler because he said it was his favorite. I don’t understand why, when Shou had 2 rulers, that he wouldn’t lend one to his sister”

What the Fuck?

I consult Shou on the matter who says he has since returned the ruler he borrowed back to the boy and was left with a 30cm ruler and a 15cm ruler so he didn’t want to give his only short ruler to Marina.

I wrote this in the notebook and just sat there shaking my head in disbelief that the teacher couldn’t just have written in MARINA’s notebook something productive along the lines of “Please make sure Marina has a 15cm ruler”

So then I check Marina’s notebook to see if anything is written about Rulergate in there.

Noooooo, she has an entire paragraph devoted to a 2B pencil.

“Marina has a lot of pencils, none of which are the required 2B. Shou on the other hand has about 5 2B pencils. I asked him to lend one to Marina and he said no they were his and that Marina left hers at home. I don’t understand why, when he has so many, he won’t share with his sister. It really confuses me.”

What the double fuckity fuck?

I consult Marina on the matter who says she doesn’t give a flying fuck about whether her pencils are 2B but that if I could find a spare perhaps she should take it to school. I have a stock of school supplies so this was no problem but I was bewildered as to why the teacher couldn’t just have written something productive along the lines of “Marina needs a 2B pencil”.

The teacher effectively wasted 10 minutes out of her day to write long winded shite about how Shou doesn’t lend stuff to Marina, even when he has an abundance of supplies, whether they be his own or ones he has mysteriously borrowed.

I went to write a long-winded reply back, something alone the lines of “please just treat them like two pupils and not brother and sister. If Marina forgets her shit I don’t expect Shou to lend something to her if he doesn’t want to. Please also don’t bother yourself over such trivial matters or else it will be a very long year for you and me both. Also please don’t write vertical cursive Japanese using a thick red pen because it takes me as long to read it as it did for you to write it.”

BUT, I controlled the urge and just wrote.

“There is a new named 15cm ruler and 2B pencil in Marina’s pencil case”.


I do feel sorry for her having both of them in the same class but getting hung up over tiny things like Shou not wanting to lend his sister a pencil is going to do my bloody head in.

I saw her at PTA last night and she brought up Rulergate and said she had been mistaken, Shou actually had THREE 15cm rulers, one of which he returned to the other boy and two which he kept. Because they were his.

I was ruffling through my bag for my car keys at the time and came across Marina’s lost 15cm ruler… ….

So I kept my mouth shut, laughed the whole thing off, drove home, and had a big glass of wine.







14 Responses to “15cm of pain”

  1. nicole nagano April 17, 2015 at 3:02 am #

    youngest son of three siblings is in second grade at primary school. since school started two weeks ago i have had a phone call from his teacher about a girls broken pencil, he has come home from the park with a lump on his forehead the size of a egg and we said sorry to a boy and his mum for unkind words. the year can only get better,hey!!!!!!!

    • gaijinwife April 17, 2015 at 3:22 am #

      OK, if you got an actual phone call about a pencil, I feel better about just the one paragraph in the notebook 🙂 If things don’t get better I will have to rob our tiny bottle store as the novelty of paying through the nose at 1800 yen for a bottle of NZ sav is going to wear off very soon!! Good luck at your end. Over and out.

  2. xanaxjunkee April 17, 2015 at 3:15 pm #

    Girl, you have more restraint than I do. I have written back snarky responses to stupid notes being sent home. We keep Andy’s teacher fully informed on his methods and yet she is still shocked that he “forgets” his supplies or doesn’t turn in homework.
    He works the poor woman but we told her, he likes to ERASE teacher notes (she should use a big person writing instrument: we have asked her to email us) and his homework out of his agenda. If we get an email or a note in pen, we can follow through. If we don’t; then we don’t know what the teacher expects, he sure as hell won’t tell us. He is busy erasing notes and ripping math problems out of his work page. Sometimes I wonder what school the woman paid to give her a teaching credential; dumber than a box of rocks that one.

    • gaijinwife April 17, 2015 at 11:30 pm #

      haha, oh dear. You would think the teacher would realize her normal avenue for contact with parents wasn’t working and that typing quick email actually faster and more productive than writing in notebook!! I can almost see Andy opening his book and thinking fuck, she wrote in pen, oh well, I’ll just rip that sucker completely out. Good Luck. xxx

  3. Elly April 18, 2015 at 1:02 am #

    What’s with the “I don’t understand. It really confuses me” bit? It’s not supposed to be about you, teacher lady :S Bit pointless, just comes across as kind of passive-agressive.
    But then how you can be a primary school teacher and not have noticed that kids normally tend to be pretty obsessive/possessive about the contents of their pencil cases is beyond me. Is she new or something?

    • gaijinwife April 18, 2015 at 1:46 am #

      Thats the thing, she has been a teacher for coming up 40 bloody years. She officially retired at the end of March, but the school asked her to stay on for one more year. She has given herself a lot of unwanted stress over the years if she is that passionate about a bloody ruler and pencil!!

  4. Mr sekimachihato April 18, 2015 at 1:33 am #

    Your school shit sounds about as productive as the workforce shit here in Japan. Does my head in day in day out.
    Btw, after my stressful day in the office I bought myself a bottle of that Overstone. Pretty good!

    • gaijinwife April 18, 2015 at 1:47 am #

      are, you’ll be dealing with your workforce shit AND the school shite simultaneously soon enough 🙂 You’ll be praising your local conbini for selling New Zealand wine!

  5. Tracy Robinson April 18, 2015 at 7:55 am #

    On the positive side if that is all she has to write long notes about then her teaching, the kids behaviour and school in general must be going swimmingly. I suspect what she is trying to tell you in “polite Japanese” is that you need to teach Shou needs to be taught to share :-).

    • gaijinwife April 18, 2015 at 8:58 am #

      He does indeed. But considering I used to pull my brother down the hallway by his ears, Shou not sharing a ruler or pencil with Marina is fine with me. And I agree, should be pleased tis notes about rulers and not bullying!!

  6. Gina Sawamura April 18, 2015 at 9:30 pm #

    I could feel my spleen trickling down my leg as I was reading this. Boy, do I not miss Japanese elementary school lol!

    • gaijinwife April 18, 2015 at 10:49 pm #

      haha. I’m looking forward to the five weeks break we get from it in July and August!! Hope you and the kids are doing well. xxx

  7. Mari April 19, 2015 at 12:11 pm #

    Hahaha omg you should write a book, it would be a bestseller!!!
    Can’t wait till my baby boy is starting kindy and school. I am totally gonna write all my thoughts his note book, I don’t care. And if you are not doing it, maybe I will write a book about all this bullshit 😀 I will credit you for the idea lol

    • gaijinwife April 19, 2015 at 11:00 pm #

      Thanks Mari. I don’t have enough concentration and/or determination to set about writing a book so good luck 🙂 Life certainly gets a lot more interesting slash entertaining slash painful as the kids get bigger!!

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