Twas the Night before Christmas

23 Dec

Well technically it is the day of the night before Christmas. Very early in that day too. Still only 5:30am. Falling asleep with the kids when they go to bed isn’t something that happens very often but when it does it means I’m awake at the crack of bloody dawn. I figured it would be a good quiet time to have a coffee, or three, and write my list for the thousand things that need doing today.

At the semi-top of that list is finishing off our New Year postcards that need to be sent out to family, friends, colleagues, not to mention the random old man I stopped and talked to briefly whilst volunteer translating at an international triathlon event in Okinawa over 17 years ago! I’m actually quite surprised Mr. M is still alive. Perhaps my 22 year old glasses just thought he was more of a vestling than he really was at the time.

Post card making has once again, in annual tradition form, nearly led to divorce. I used to do the whole lot. Choose photos for the front, arrange them all, add some standard Japanese New Year phrase, print 150 out and then print out all the Japanese addresses. The first year I did this I had to physically input all the addresses by looking at the cards from the previous year. I would say seven thirds of the cards are work and family related ones for hub. Each year a few more get added depending on whether he changes offices or not, a few get deleted depending on who stopped sending them to us, and a few get skipped for a year depending on whether or not they sent out a card during the year saying not to send then a NY card because a family member had passed away.

It is all rather confusing and in my head it just makes so much more sense for the Japanese spouse, you know, the one with the native Japanese skills, to be doing the addresses. There were a couple of years there where we had some very heated debates about how he shouldn’t be losing his shit because I printed out a card to Mr. Tree-Hill-Stream instead of Mr. Forest-Mountain-Raging River.

I then put my pregnant hormonal foot down one year and told him to Fuck off about the NY cards. He had to do all the addresses and check them and then I would just open the bloody file and press print. Of course THAT year I printed the photo side the wrong away – apparently. So that if you were looking at the address side and then turned it over the photo was facing the wrong way – of course only if you turned the post card over from the right. For fucks sake.

So anyhoo, this year I bought a new printer and spent a good part of Tuesday trying to get it set up to the wi-fi, playing music and making me coffee. The printer itself is now connected, like totally, but it won’t have a bar of my computer. I can’t get them to be friends unless I use the old school cord. I know! Faaaark. I’m not sure if it’s an Epson doesn’t like Mac kind of problem. I doubt it. Probably more to do with fact can’t be bothered opening the Japanese instruction manual. OMG. That’s it! I’ve been trying to work it out like a MAN (goes to get manual to read later).

Hub brought home a USB with the address file on it. After spending more of yesterday getting the photo side sorted and printed off, I then tried to open the address file, which my computer immediately revolted again and completely fucked over by instantly deleting ever address except the last one. Hub could see me starting to rage and stupidly said, lets just flag the NY cards this year aye, if they’re that much of a pain in the ass.

This is not a productive or useful statement I want to hear after just printing off 150 pre-paid New Year post cards. I also cannot tick anything else off my list until its all done and they are in the post – unless of course I add ‘Fuck up the NY cards again’ to that list!

So today, when hub wakes up, and now that I’m calmer and about to get on to my second coffee, I will kindly ask hub to send the file from work to my email account, which I will then open on his old computer which I ‘think’ I can get sorted out with the new printer. Of course seven of the keys on the keyboard don’t work and it could possibly take until lunch time to print out thirty post cards BUT, needs must.

Oh shit, and it is Christmas eve day and we have a family of five joining us for Christmas dinner tomorrow, which will be a mix of NZ pork roast meets large pasta dishes to fill people up meets I have a really small oven.

Meets very large glasses of champagne.

The house needs to be cleaned, a lasagna and pudding need to be cooked, stockings need to be wrapped, winner winner chicken dinner for tonight needs to be prepared, one English class to have, a table set with Christmas placings and new wine glasses.

Oh, and futons sorted for the three kids of the family who are staying the night after Christmas dinner. I said Shou’s friend could stay. We know his two brothers well, I teach them all English, they are all at the same school yaddah yaddah, but I wasn’t thinking they would all be crashing the night – until I got a txt last night from my friend saying it was A.O.K at their end if all the kids stayed. I asked hub about it and he said he told the dad it was OK.

Fuck, that means I need to get more breakfast stuffs for Saturday.

Wish me luck.

Merry Christmas to you and yours. May it be full of laughter, lots of cheer, bubbles, cake, joy and good will to all men.




22 Responses to “Twas the Night before Christmas”

  1. Anonymous December 23, 2015 at 9:09 pm #


    • gaijinwife December 23, 2015 at 11:47 pm #

      Thank you. Am just having another coffee and about to pump up the sounds so I can dance round like a coffee-raged lunatic while I do the housework and forget about the bloody NY cards for a while. No success this morning either.

  2. Grace December 23, 2015 at 9:59 pm #

    So good to hear from you! Was about to send an email asking if all was OK!
    Have a good one, hope it all goes well and may 2016 bring you joy, happiness, good health and a bit more time to blog and keep us up to date with what is going on in your world!

    • gaijinwife December 23, 2015 at 11:47 pm #

      Will try and be more blog consistent πŸ™‚ I miss it. Merry Christmas to you and yours Grace. Hope you have a fabulous festive season.

  3. japanmama December 23, 2015 at 10:11 pm #

    ARghhh, the dreaded New Year cards! Like a complete wuss, I have declared that I’m not sending them anymore. I’m guessing the friends I have who don’t receive one will know that it’s not because I am breaking up with them, and the ones that aren’t really friends will gracefully retreat and not throw eggs at my house. Merry Christmas and the best of luck for getting ready for the guests. Rather you than me!

    • gaijinwife December 23, 2015 at 11:49 pm #

      Hub has declared that my Mac is a complete piece of shit (which in this instance it is because won’t cooperate with his word file) and that he should have bought the computer he was going to yesterday- Grrrr. I even gave him half the cost of the new computer and he came home with nothing. He has now said he will print them at work tomorrow. Fine. Must remember this for next year.

      Right, off to clean!

  4. Mrs. N December 23, 2015 at 11:24 pm #

    Merry Christmas Katy! I’m sure you will get it all sorted and you’ll have a lovely holiday. Best wishes to you and your family.

    • gaijinwife December 23, 2015 at 11:50 pm #

      Merry Christmas to you too. Hope you have a festive but relaxing holiday season. xx

  5. Nikki December 26, 2015 at 9:23 pm #

    Hope all went well
    Good to hear you are ok

    • gaijinwife December 28, 2015 at 12:08 am #

      Thanks Nikki. All OK in the end πŸ™‚

  6. Debra December 27, 2015 at 12:21 pm #

    Merry Christmas, hope your cards are all nicely printed and in the mail !

    • gaijinwife December 28, 2015 at 12:08 am #

      Dropped them off first thing this morning. Fingers crossed they are in time to meet the Jan 1st deliveries and not Jan 2nd – not that I give a shit but hub would be mortified….FFS.

  7. Ann December 30, 2015 at 10:16 am #

    Merry Christmas and happy New Year to you and your family. You crack me up describing your life in rural Japan, you are really talented writer πŸ˜€ it is so weird, but way of living in rural Japan remind me somewhat of way of living in small vilages in Europe. I think old vestlings are all the same across the world. Anyhow greetings from Europe, and sorry for errors in english, english is not my native language πŸ˜€

    • gaijinwife December 31, 2015 at 11:25 am #

      Your English is fantastic Ann, please don’t apologize. I could never sound so eloquent in Japanese, let alone French πŸ™‚ I would imagine that small town rural life is, in some regards, universal across the board. We are about to welcome in a very rural new year. Happy New Year to you and your family xx

      • Jenny January 3, 2016 at 12:19 am #

        Glad to know I’m not alone in worrying about you when your blog goes quiet (is it a sign of mental illness that I am so invested in someone halfway across the world who says the things I think)? FYI – none of my biz at all but Another Japan blogger says that you must drop off on 12/25 for the guaranteed and very desirable 1/1 delivery. Ha! My husband has given up on me sending Christmas cards. I actually enjoy and then hide all of the ones we receive from people he cares about. Hope all are well and happiest of New Years! (even & especially Granny K)! Ps. How did Christmas dinner turn out?

  8. gaijinwife January 3, 2016 at 9:49 am #

    Thanks Jenny πŸ™‚ Christmas dinner went well – the back up lasagna for hungry people got complete demolished and one of the boys even asked for the non-existent left overs for breakfast! Even the salad bowl was clean. I will try to blog more this year πŸ™‚ promise.

  9. littlebelgianwriter January 3, 2016 at 5:54 pm #

    I hope your Christmas went well, and of course Happy New Year to you!

    • gaijinwife January 6, 2016 at 9:28 am #

      Thank you and belated Christmas greetings to you too. Here’s hoping 2016 is fabulous for us all!

  10. Susan (Eastendmom) January 20, 2016 at 4:40 am #

    Katy! Where are you?

  11. Grace January 25, 2016 at 12:38 am #

    Hey, you promised to blog a bit more frequently this year πŸ˜€ Hope all is ok in GW world xx

    • gaijinwife January 28, 2016 at 5:54 am #

      I know, pathetic effort on my part. Fortunately losing weight and blogging everyday weren’t new year resolutions or I would have failed about an hour into 2016 πŸ™‚ Must. Try. Harder. xx

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: